Oh, Joy.

I've heard that unless your children embarrass you in public, you're doing it wrong. Claire has only been a smidge embarrassing, (Until she threw the tantrum from Hell at DI and a thousand people told me to "Put the child down and we'll let you go" and prove that she was indeed my child) but then we added another kid. When you have two so close together, you're bound for some really embarrassing situations. Or so I've learned the hard way.

When you're pregnant and huge and there is absolutely no room for your bladder in what used to be your stomach and you cough or sneeze or laugh AND pee your pants, it's funny. Everyone around can sympathize or relate, and it's really not THAT embarrassing. When you're not pregnant and you pee your pants because you couldn't get to the bathroom in time, and you're not 4, well, it's pretty embarrassing.

Claire is going through this phase where she loves to push the cart. It lasts for a little while, but then she transforms into a little space cadet and needs to explore EVERYTHING she sees. Even the pattern of the markings on the floor.

So earlier this week, I went to Walmart. I was replacing a couple blinds in our house, and had to pick up a couple other things. And then I needed to GO. Now, I drink between five and six liters of water a DAY. I drink A LOT of water. And when you add my diet coke addiction, milk, juice, whatever on top of that, we're in trouble.

Anyway, so we're walking through the grocery store and then I start to walk as fast as possible without running. And where is Claire? Oh you know, mosing about looking at things, playing with things, sitting on the floor, running AWAY from me. And I can't put her in the stupid cart without people think I'm kidnapping a child. (We're NOT going through that experience again.)

I start to panic. I'm now running with the store in small spurts when Claire thinks we're playing a game, and then she'd run off in a different direction and hide. Or sit staring at the tile. So I ended up racing to the bathroom. I wanted to use the family one, but some teenage girl was in there doing who knows what. (I have a thing when people use the handicapped or family restrooms when they don't need it and I end up dancing around with my two kids and massive stroller. So I run for the women's restroom, leaving the cart outside the bathroom, but taking Aoife with me. Aoife ends up on the floor by the sinks, Claire is somewhere nearby, and all the while I have begun to pee my pants. Thankfully a person at the customer service desk had seen my hilarious performance and Claire was right there waiting for me right outside the door.

We quickly finished up our shopping trip and went home. And then it happened again the next day at the farm!! Claire couldn't stop looking at the rocks on the ground, and I didn't have a stroller. Aoife sat patiently outside the porta-potty while Claire paraded around all of the potties, feeling free to open the door and expose her mother.

I love my children, I really do. Bless their hearts. I don't think I'll be doing any shopping with the girls for a while. But who could be upset with these two little cuties?!