I recently read this article. This will pretty much sum it up for you.
"Teaching girls that their appearance is the first thing you notice tells them that looks are more important than anything. It sets them up for dieting at age 5 and foundation at age 11 and boob jobs at 17 and Botox at 23. As our cultural imperative for girls to be hot 24/7 has become the new normal, American women have become increasingly unhappy. What's missing? A life of meaning, a life of ideas and reading books and being valued for our thoughts and accomplishments."
This gal talks about refraining from telling little girls how cute they are and instead talking to them about their interests, things they're thinking, and what they're reading.
I wear make-up daily. Whether I take the time to straighten it, or fix it up in a neat pony-tail, I try to do my hair every day. I have six or seven different exercise DVDs on my shelf that are solely mine. Not only that, but I do exactly what this woman says we shouldn't do. I make a point every single day to tell Claire she is beautiful. And I think it's important.
There is a difference between telling little girls they are beautiful, and telling them they could be beautiful IF... I decided a long time ago that I would never say anything in front of Claire about her or my body, especially about something being "wrong" with it.
I want Claire to KNOW that she is beautiful, even with snot running down from both nostrils, and who knows what smeared in her hair and on her clothes. But that isn't the only thing I want her to know. I also make a point each day to tell Claire that she is smart, that she is important, and that I love her. I want my girls to grow up to be strong, independent, smart, confident women. Ross and I went to see The Help in the dollar theater last week. (Side note -We were BLOWN AWAY!!!! Absolutely loved it!) This little clip made me think about Claire and has stuck with me since.
We read books together multiple times each day. We practice counting fingers and toes, and we sing songs together. Over and over again. Claire also sits on the bathroom counter and talks with me while I put on my make-up. And I love it.
Ross often says he'd be perfectly happy if we only ever had girls. While I still have my heart set on getting some Boy Scout mom jewelry, I do love being the mom of little girls. Being a mom is an overwhelming responsibility at times. Hopefully I'm not screwing up too badly!
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
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I have yet to see The Help, but read the book and LOVED it!! I want to watch the movie so bad. Love the post!!!! You are an amazing mom and your kids are lucky to have you :)
ReplyDeleteI read that article a few months ago, and I feel the same way as you, Katie. I feel that it's very important to tell our daughters that they're beautiful—no matter what. I think people get a bit bunched up about appearance that they swing ALL the way to the other side. I like being told I look beautiful by my husband. I don't feel "not smart" because of it.
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