Please Disregard Any Broken Windows or Dents on Cars For a Couple Weeks

It's perfect. A few weeks ago I was waking up at odd hours of the night. Starving. Now I have a purpose in being awake at strange times. I'll probably develop a decent throwing arm, too. Hello turkey bowl.

Today was my first day. It was surprisingly relaxing. You're the only person on the road in what seems like the entire city. And not gonna lie, it was a freaking blast. I mean, how often do you get to drive on BOTH sides of the road, windows down, throwing things as hard as you can?

I really like that I get to come home and make Ross breakfast and lunch. After I go back to bed, I still have so much time in the day to do everything else that needs to get done. Perfect job for mama.

Now, if only I got to be on a bike, too, I'd get some SERIOUS exercise.

I Drink Milk From A Glass, So That Means I'm A Real Grown Up Now, Right?

Almost anyone who has ever eaten a meal with me understands that I will only drink milk from a plastic cup. It just tastes better that way. When you buy the milk, it comes in a plastic jug. Milk is just meant to be in plastic. Growing up, we had very few plastic cups but those were MY cups. Simply existing for the purpose of allowing Kate to drink milk.

Not anymore. Since being married, we have only had ONE, yes ONE plastic cup. That cup happens to be my favorite. It's green and tall and just all around BIG. I fill it was ice water while cleaning the house, juice-so I don't have to get up five times to refill it, and stick it in the car when I need to pick up Ross. It's the cup that is so big, no refill is required. The downside is that there is only ONE of them and requires a lot of washing.

For the last eight months, Ross has been weening me onto actual glasses at meal time. Where we usually drink MILK. For the first few months, I would INSIST on having my plastic cup. When I had a glass full of milk, I'd shut my eyes, squint my nose, and try to make the pain of enduring milk from a GLASS as short as possible. I hated it.

My family, especially my parents, would be so impressed to hear me say that I now drink milk from a glass, without whining or complaining. At all. So, that means I'm a REAL grown up now, right? Though, I'd still argue that milk tastes better in plastic. A mug would even be better than a cup. But the important thing is that I now drink milk from a real glass.

So Here's The Deal

I want a jogging stroller, and I want one BAD. A DOUBLE jogging stroller to be exact.

Please?

It's June, And My Life Revolves Around Food.

I'm all about positive reinforcement, especially when it comes to goals. I love reward systems that motivate me. For the last few months all of the goals I had in line since January have gone out the window. The second story window. One of those goals was exercising.

A few of you know that in the beginning, Ross was very diligent with P90X. He LOVED it. Meanwhile, I bought some Billy Banks Tae Bo tapes. Ross would be doing homework in his study room, laughing at the black man on the TV yelling with enthusiasm. I'm POSITIVE that secretely he really really wanted to run out and start moving with me. The tapes are hilarious and goofy which fits me perfectly. I still remember when busting out my mom's old Kathy Smith's Winning Workout tapes when I was little. I always wanted an 80's bright leotard. So having a black man with a huge grin screaming with enthusiasm is my cup of tea. Though, I'd also run a little and do 100 sit ups each day. Even with the screaming, smiling huge black man, it didn't take long to lose my motivation. I decided to try P90X.

HOLY COW. Talk about a work out. Tony Horton is all about changing your entire life style and getting you in the best shape you have ever been in. And it is HARD. I guess getting in shape wasn't enough of a motivator for me. That's when we started the tanning plan.

If you've seen me, even just across the room in the dark, I stand out. I'm pastey white. Glow in the dark white to be more correct. Tanning was the perfect motivation. Ross had gone tanning before and he really loved it, so it was just an extra bit of fun for him. This was the plan. If I completed all six of the DVDs that week, Saturday afternoon we got to go tanning. Here's the catch. BOTH of us had to do it and FINISH each one. An hour and a half of intense Yoga on Thursdays was rough. Only the idea of eight minutes in tropical bliss could keep me going. I loved it. I used the little stickers to mark my progress and felt fantastic. I was getting more fit and looked and felt great, AND I was TAN.

Then we got pregnant. And I felt MISERABLE for a little over a month. No more tanning and I sure didn't want to work out! I just wanted to lay on the couch and eat pickles, popsicles, burgers, and cupcakes. All at once.

Then May happened and second trimester happened. I began to notice the added volume and surface area in my buttock region. (Honestly, I like the extra booty. Now I actually HAVE a booty) But here's the extra bonus. I was feeling GREAT! I've never had so much energy in my life! I started using the treadmill again. And then the cycle started again. The lack of motivation hit.

I can't go tanning without cooking the baby. I think the hardest part is I LOVE hot baths. The kind of baths where you can see the water evaporating and steam rising from the tub. Now, every now and then, Ross will come in and stick his hand in the water just to make sure I'm not being selfish and making baby stew in my stomach.

A few weeks ago we were playing bananagrams with some great friends of ours. (We love games.) -Bananagrams is kind of like scrabble, but you build your own. At the end of the game, Ross was looking at my set up and started laughing. All of the words I had formed were all FOOD items. We had JUST eaten dinner. Ross had been asking what I wanted for my birthday. All I could come up with were certain foods that I wanted. Food was taking over my LIFE. My child is not going to be made up of those cute lists that rhyme saying what little boys and girls are made of. My child is going to be made up of burgers and popsicles.

My life is run by food. That's when I came up with the perfect idea. The perfect motivator. I made a chart. My chart looks like this. for every six days I exercise (doesn't have to be in a row, just SIX days) I get a snack day. You need to understand, when I want a certain food, the want doesn't go away until I get it. It'll start as an idea. An 'oh that sounds good' idea. Then it'll just grow from there till I'm ready to beat someone up to get it. (not really, but that's how badly I want it!) So if I think of something I want, but decide I can't have it till I exercise six times, by the time those six days are up, I'd do ANYTHING to get it. (If you ever want me to do anything for you, just bribe me with a jar of pickles, a burger, rice krispies and I'll be in the palm of your hand. Seriously. It's BAD.)

Yesterday I exercised. We had family prayer. I washed my face. I'm reading a lot more books and cooking dinner and cleaning the house. We even did family scripture study. I think my exercise/snack chart is helping me remember my other goals that have gone out the window. The poster I made when I was doing P90X is even up on the fridge, though I don't know what good it'll do. (It's a pic of Tony Horton smiling and pointing his finger with a word bubble saying Kate! Don't eat that!) I'm ready to make June a good month. Even if it's controlled and motivated solely by FOOD.